Single and Ready-to-Mingle Schedule for Valentine’s Day
By Orly Perez Frid
As another Valentine’s Day rolls around where I have found myself single, again, I decided to find the best way to spend it (other than miserably scrolling through Instagram stories and wondering which one of these couples will break up first). After some research, I present you with, what I believe, is the best Valentine’s Day schedule for all my single and ready-to-mingle readers out there. * Disclaimer: since Valentine's this year falls on a random Wednesday, this schedule was crafted for the following Saturday (02/17).
Between 10 and 11am: wake up hungover from the Valentine’s Day frat party you went to last night. Stare at the ceiling for a couple of minutes while trying to remember if you did anything embarrassing the night before. If your answer is yes, go into an overthinking spiral that will make your hangxiety go through the roof for the next 24 hours; if the answer is no, get ready to go to breakfast. This is your first opportunity to start scrolling through Instagram, TikTok, and/or Snapchat, and regret it immediately.
Between 11am and 1pm: go to Mather with your friends while avoiding eye contact with yesterday’s mistake. Have a nice little recap of everything that happened the night before (because we all know having inappropriate conversations in Mather is every Trinity student’s favorite hobby) and enjoy your smoothie.
Between 1 and 5pm: this space of the schedule is open for whatever you may need. So go do homework, take a nap, or go outside to the Quad because it looks sunny only to go back to your dorm 5 minutes later because it’s still freezing, the world is your oyster. Just don’t forget to have your Heartbroken playlist in the background and the occasional scroll through your preferred social media platform to remind you of your loneliness.
Between 5 and 7pm: GALENTINES TIME. You and your friends will organize a little dinner in someone's common room, with a charcuterie board, some wine, chocolates, and a tacky gift exchange (because we are all broke college students who can’t afford to buy nice presents for every person in our friend group). Then your friends who are in relationships will try to convince you that you are still their priority, right before leaving for a couple of hours to Facetime their long-distance significant other or come back with some lovely after-sex hair. As always, keep yourself updated on all the happy-couple posts.
Between 7 and 7:30pm: it’s time to think about all your failed crushes, situationships, and relationships of the past year while blasting sad music. Feel free to go further down your timeline and reminisce about all the heartbreaks you have had. Stalking on Instagram is permitted as long as you don’t accidentally like any of their posts from 2016. When you reach the inevitable conclusion of “It only made me stronger,” “I’m glad it’s over now,” or “ F**k them” it’s time to move to the next part of the schedule.
Between 7:30 and 9pm: time to watch a romcom while eating that month-old ice cream pint you have in your fridge. Here are my recommendations (but feel free to ignore them and watch your comfort movie for the hundredth time): “Crazy Rich Asians,” “He’s Just Not That Into You,” “Bridesmaids,” “The Princess Diaries” (1 or 2), “Crazy, Stupid, Love,” or “500 Days of Summer.” Crying gives you bonus points.
Between 9 and 11:30pm: if you’re an introvert choose a second movie from the list above and call it a night; if you’re ready to drown your sorrows in alcohol then change the mood with your I’m a bad bitch playlist and start getting ready for the pregame. If someone mentions that it looks like you’ve been crying: DENY EVERYTHING.
11:30pm forward: there are only a couple of hours left until the countdown to find someone for next year’s Valentine’s Day begins, so enjoy the crappy frat music, hug your friends, tell them how much you love them, try not to go into the “I’m gonna die alone” spiral, and remind yourself that you are all you need to be happy.
In Spanish Valentine’s is called el Día del Amor y la Amistad which means the Day of Love and Friendship. So I wish everyone a Happy Friendship Day :)
